“Just one step outside your house, and you’ll discover a new version of you.” – Drew Mirandus
Disclaimer: This post is not sponsored by any brand, business, or company mentioned. All opinions and experiences shared are my own.
It was in late October of 2024 that I first stepped on the beaches of Boracay, Philippines. It was nearly 12 years since I first and last rode an airplane to Cebu as a gift for me from my relatives for graduating as valedictorian from my elementary school. It was actually a work trip; but, since I would be there for the first time, I took my chances to explore for a bit. Not knowing when I’ll come back was a bit of a terrifying thing to think about; but, I did my best to say that I enjoyed there. And, needless to say, it woke a part of me in this spiritual journey.
DAY 0.
I stayed with my colleague’s condominium around Pasig City the night before so that I wouldn’t worry about the traffic. I brought a luggage full of clothes and shenanigans that I would have needed to enjoy the trip. I brought a bag full of small, cheap cameras and my other technological needs because I wanted to record my memories and my experiences while I was there at the island. I also had a couple of things that my paranoid mind thought of bringing just in case something happened to me. And, for a trip like this, I was overly prepared in terms of the material; but, not in terms of the immaterial. I was focused on work and meeting with my colleagues that I hadn’t really thought of the fun things that I could’ve done on that short trip. I was so distraught by my own financial shortcomings and issues that I was covering for that I only brought a very small amount of money for a place like that (but, still, kept in mind that I had to save for future issues and to not indulge in the beauty, food, and more things that the island was offering).
That rainy night in my coworker’s place, we had a couple of drinks and talked about vision boarding, and random things that we’re busying ourselves about. His girlfriend, someone I just met that night, showed her own set of tarot cards that was newly bought. The energy was fresh; so, after drinking bottles and cans of San Miguel, we went to a nearby table and had a reading. We took turns so we could get to know the cards more. I was the first one to have those talk to me. Of course, those read me to filth – in a sense, that those told me that I was too stressed and too worried about the future and my problems that I wasn’t aware of the present, and of those forces that were helping me on the back end. Card after card, she recognized that I was indeed burdened by a lot of things that only I should handle and fix, and that I needed a space and time to rest and simply have fun. She also mentioned that a feminine figure, a relative that already passed, have been helping me on the back-end.
And, when we were done with the readings, the entire building went quiet but my mind didn’t. I was awake until 4 AM. My subconscious already knew about my lack of rest and relaxation for so long; but, I didn’t really have enough avenues to have genuine fun. Yes, I partied a lot before to release all of the stresses from my body, but it was tiring and I didn’t really want to be drinking a lot. I did my best to get rid of my sleep debt but I was always thinking of finding solutions to my problems. I did a lot of self-reflection; but, only with regard to my capabilities as a person.
DAY 1.
I woke up at around 6 AM, when everybody else was still asleep. I decided to leave the place and went to the rooftop as it was always a fascination of mine to look from a far. At the 26th floor, I opened the steel door and felt a very cold breeze. I could hear the traffic from different sections outside of the condominium – but, it didn’t sound noisy as it sounded like a calming music to my ears. Even though it was dark and cloudy, I could see factories opening up – with smoke coming from their chimneys, old people walking their dogs on the rooftops of nearby buildings, young ones walking down the street after a night out, and, a lot more that made me feel like I was a non-playable character. I could smell the sweetness of the polluted air as if I was back in the provinces with nothing to worry about. I did my best to not think about it, and listened to HAIM’s music catalogue and stayed there for more than an hour.
Los Angeles – It felt like I really wanted to escape from everything. You know that desire to just go to a place where no one knows you and just restart? I want to do that and more. When the song started, my mind drifted to a reality where my family doesn’t have any problems and we’re just able to do the things that we want to accomplish – my mother being able to enjoy womanhood and partake in silly things without worrying; my father, able to go back to his province with no problems, tinkering on things that he’s clearly enjoying; my brother, with no financial problems, able to pursue his creative passion and perform with his band; and, me. just traveling all around the country and around the world, carrying a lot of souvenirs and recording my memories. I could feel how much I wanted it that it almost felt like a lie. But, then I remembered the song, Now I’m In It. The song gave me a quiet push to think that I already was so far from where I was originally, that there was no point in going back or restarting. That, despite feeling alone in my head, I really wasn’t. That, I could make it – therefore, I could not lose hope and myself. Better days are always coming, one after another.
I went down before 8 AM to eat breakfast so we could prepare ourselves and leave for the airport, a few hours after our flight. The couple went their way and bought me my own food and we talked about the things that we we’re looking forward on the trip. To be honest, I was only looking forward to the drinks that I wanted to try and the cheap souvenirs that I wanted to buy for my relatives. I was already happy with the thought of buying refrigerator magnets, tote bags, keychains, and treats. As for the food and drinks, I was already happy on the idea that someone might buy me a bottle and a sandwich.
We left Pasig City and went to the Ninoy Aquino International Airport (NAIA). We hoped that it would be a clear day; or, at least, we won’t experience any rain whilst our journey because we didn’t really like getting wet. However, in the middle of the flight, the sky darkened and we encountered turbulence here and there. As someone whose last flight was more than a decade ago, I was surprisingly calm. However, I was curious as to how people reacted so that I knew what I would do. I looked to my left side, I was sitting on an aisle seat, and saw that the Chinese couple was just chatting with each other. I looked to my right and saw teenagers just giggling while they’re on their phones. At the front, I saw a Turkish man walk towards his family so he could console his baby who was near erratic because of the sudden movements of the plane. But, a good thing was that we arrived safely.
When the plane landed, it was raining really hard that we couldn’t see anything in the outside. It was becoming really cold because of the weather and the air conditioning inside the air craft, that I almost took out a jacket from my hand carry. We went out, with the flight attendants offering us big umbrellas so we wouldn’t get wet. As we, the passengers, walked towards the Godofredo P. Ramos Airport in Caticlan, the winds were getting stronger; so, me and my colleague waited for our other coworkers who were in the same flight so we knew that they were safe. After meeting everyone else, we waited on the other side of the building for our van transport to the port; and, there I saw sad faces of those who were expecting warm sunlight. I could faintly hear one complaining about spending much money to go to Boracay just to experience the same monsoon that they were escaping from from Manila. Me? I was just happy to be there. I knew that I could make it work and still enjoy the place, regardless of the weather.
Finally, our transport came and we went our way to the port. We already knew that it was going to be a bumpy ride as we travel to Boracay so we just laughed our behinds off and just enjoyed the trip (however, some of us were already looking for a safe spot to smoke a stick of cigarette so they could lessen their worries and anxiety).
When we arrived at our destination, we were still excited going to our accommodations even though we’re already too wet. It was still a walk for a few minutes; but, we weren’t bothered. We were going to stay in Boracay Ocean Club Resort & Spa, a big establishment in Station 3. Since our stay (including our airfare) was free, we didn’t want to miss our chance to start enjoying the place. In addition, we were told that someone we know was going to give free drinks by the bar within the compound. So, when my colleague and I arrived to the place, we immediately went to our room, dropped and arranged out stuff, drank coffee, and freshened up. We didn’t want to miss any second from our trip.
The first night was chaotic as it was eventful. We went down to the bar and it turned out that one of our superiors was the one who was giving the free drinks AND we were the only two who came as the others were too tired because of the travel to the island. Kudos to the cashier and the bartender who saw us that we were the only ones drinking. I may not remember your names but you both made our first day really fun. The cashier was indeed welcoming and we had a lot of chat about Boracay and where I was from – she was indeed curious about what Manila is. The bartender, besides being cute, gave us drinks of his own making – there was no name, but it had taste notes of cherry and coconut. My roommate, our boss and his friend, we all had a lot of this drink. Friendly banter was being thrown back and forth. Weirdly enough, I even had a short political discussion with our boss’ friend – which is always fun to do when you’re drinking. The thing is: this was just the first part of the night; but, I already knew that I want to be back in the near future.
As I smoked my first stick of the night (Sorry, mother!), I was messaging my friends about how happy and relaxed I was feeling. It was an odd feeling because the last time was so long ago that I forgot everything about it. It was as if as my problems were all gone for a while and that I wanted that feeling to last for so long. I gave up to the feeling and enjoyed the present – maybe that’s the reason why I remember almost all of the details from that trip. It was as if as my soul was rejuvenated and a new version of myself came out from the inside. That no amount of stressors could trigger me from that point moving forward.
After a while, we went out of the bar and went to the buffet area and ate our dinner. Afterwards, I went to our room and took another bath because I wanted to try a bath tub for the first time. This is a side note but I don’t really understand the hype of it. When I sat and tried to relax, yes, it was calming; but, that was only because I was listening to the music. I didn’t really feel clean afterwards so I took a shower afterwards. However, I digress…
I went down and met with our other teammates. We decided to take a walk towards Station 2 to check out the restaurants and other places that would’ve been points of interest. Even if the rain just stopped for a few hours, there were a lot of people on the beach. Foreigners that seemed localized, locals who were selling a lot of products and services to visitors that were unaware of the offerings of the island – from island tours to braids to quick massages. Every establishment was alive with bright lights and music that I almost got overstimulated. There were too many things that were happening but I was at peace. It was as if as I was a local there.
As we’re walking, we collectively decided to drink that night, despite our exhaustion from traveling, because we were only there for three nights and two days and that we had to make the most of it. We were supposed to drink at a famous club; but, half of us decided to eat again at another buffet place. The rest of us who were already full decided to do a pre-game at a nearby bar while waiting for them. As we arrived and ordered drinks and snacks, the rain poured so hard. It was almost torrential.
That didn’t dampen my spirits as people inside the bar were still enjoying the music and drinks with everybody. However, two hours passed and the rain was still going on. I contacted someone who where at the buffet place and they were still waiting for the rain to stop but we’re already thinking of going back to the resort. I got so tired and bored from waiting, that I, ultimately, decided to just brave through the big raindrops and intense winds. Of course, I didn’t bring an umbrella because I didn’t expect to have that kind of weather so I was wet from the inside out of my clothes. Unfortunately, it was a 15-minute walk (using my stride as reference). However, I got no choice. I just wanted to go back and I did (safe and sound). Upon arriving, my roommate and I just bought ramen from the nearest 7/11 and ate so we could get warmth. We went to bed as soon as we could.
DAY 2.
I woke up with a slight cold. It was a good thing that the white blanket I had was a bit thick and the mattress of the bed that I slept on was so soft that I had a good rest – despite, sleeping for a few hours, again (I know, it’s a sickness of mine.). I could hear my alarm fighting off the chicken cries from the outside. And, even though I still wanted to sleep in, we had things to do that day so I got up as soon as I could.
When I went out to eat our free breakfast, it wasn’t raining anymore. The sky was very dark and the winds were going hard; but, I was still looking forward to the day. The buffet was filled with Korean, Filipino, and American dishes that I didn’t know what to get first. I grabbed a couple of plates and filled those with so much rice, meat, side dishes and even desserts. Weight was not my concern that trip. I ate as much as I wanted to and I was indeed satisfied. I drank two cups of coffee, instead of just one per breakfast, because it just felt like I deserved good coffee. I smoked another stick and went back to my room to prepare for the schedule-filled day.
With our free time in the afternoon, we went outside of the compound and explored the different stations again. Since it’s still day time, we saw a lot of open places where people could buy souvenirs – from food to bags and the like. The prices ranged from PHP 60 above. Everything was handmade except for the snacks that were factory-produced locally. While most of my colleagues that I’m with we’re looking at shirts and other potential clothing for the night, I was looking at trinkets. I needed to buy for my mother, her sister, and my grandmother. I looked at keychains and magnets and bought for each and every one of them. I looked around and saw cute bags that looked sturdy enough for long-term use. I bought an open one for around PHP 200 and another, zippered now, for around PHP 100.
To be honest, there were a lot of things that piqued by interest. I just didn’t have enough money to buy for myself. Maybe, the next time that I’ll be here will be the time that I’ll bring an empty luggage to fill it with a lot of memorabilia from Boracay. And, hopefully, maybe I’ll be able to bring my family here for longer than three days and two nights.
After the “shopping spree”, my colleague and I randomly decided to pre-game in the afternoon at the bar below our building. The last hurrah as it were. We were hoping to drink the secret recipe but the bartender wasn’t there until night; so, I opt for a familiar cocktail – which turned out to be stronger. While drinking, we bought their own version of sisig and we found it to be so immaculate. All the saltiness, spiciness, and the umami flavor were all working together; and, to be honest, if we didn’t have a party that night, we would’ve bought rice and ate a lot. It’s definitely a must try. We also decided to tip both him and the cashier because they were so fun and they made our Boracay trip really worthwhile. They should definitely receive a raise just because of their hospitality.
As we ate and drink, internally, I had something going on. I was becoming a bit emotional because I never thought that I was going to be able to simply have fun. Before the trip, I was so anxious and worried about what’s to come in the future. Honestly, I feared that this was a once in a lifetime thing. Not until, I was sitting in front of the beach, drinking cocktails. When that moment happened, it felt like going here was just a simple, common thing for me to do. That, going to a beautiful place like this was normal. And, that if I was able to go here despite my limitations, I could go anywhere I want. If I could go anywhere I want to, then it means that I could be whoever I want to be and I could achieve anything. Yes, this might be a singular tourist destination for people to go for vacation; but, I ended up attaching a sentimental value to this place… and even to the act of traveling.
And, that night. Oh, what a wonderful night. It was simply a moment of celebration; but, then I got an award for being one of the best. It was such an amazing thing to receive. Not only that I got proof about my capacity of enjoyment, I also got a confirmation from the universe that I was doing a great job. It felt like those days when I got my medals during my graduation from my elementary school. Both instances (and, yes – despite of its meritocratic nature) made me feel like I was on the right track; and, that I should just keep swimming. And, to cap off the celebration, even though it was near midnight, I decided to go to a club and dance and drink to my heart’s content.
DAY 3.
I drank so much that I wasn’t able to sleep. After going back to the resort around 4 AM, I took a bath and decided to arrange all of my belongings to prepare for our departure. We were expected to be awake around 7 AM so that we could eat our breakfast and we could arrive to the airport earlier than expected; so, I never slept at all. After preparing my belongings, I woke up my very drunk colleague so that we could go down and wait for the rest of the people that we were supposed to be with on our transport to the airport. Did I regret drinking too much? Of course, not. However, I did regret not being able to extend my stay. Since I wasn’t able to make extra steps due to certain circumstances, it just meant that it was time to go. Maybe, the universe wanted me to taste a possible reality if I kept on pushing to being the best on what I do and remaining myself as present as I could.
And, an extra face of Boracay welcomed me. The sky was clear and blue. The winds were just enough to touch me – saying both “hello” and “goodbye”. The sun was really bright. It was as if as I just needed to have such contemplation, reflection, and catharsis so that it’ll appear. There were no disturbances. both in the weather and in my heart. The waters and the skies were calm when we journeyed back home. I might have suffered from the flu due to the lack of proper sleep and frequent exposure to the rain, migraine and nausea from all of the drinking and traveling, and empty wallets from all of my expenses; but, all in all, it was worth it. Although, it was a good thing that we were given some Berocca vitamins; because, I might have suffered for longer.
Was the trip perfect? No. It would’ve been nice if I stayed longer or if the weather wasn’t gloomy. I would’ve explored more if I had enough money. A lot of mishaps happened; and, there may be time that was wasted. However, I did everything to make it work. The imperfections made the trip special. And, I know I will be back. I’m sure of it. I owe it to myself who will see how much he pushed.
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